FGF.......Noah's Valentine's Day Greeting!

     Cheryl and I received a little Valentine's Day letter from our six-year-old Noah. Here it is:
     Dear Mom and Dad... There are many reasons why I love you. I love you Mom because you're pretty. I love you Dad because you are a smart lawyer. Mom you take me to basketball. Mom you are a good cleaner. I love you both. Love, Noah
    Does anybody but me see the problem with this lovely letter? I barely got a mention. How is it that I am limited to being a smart lawyer, basically a bread winner, and mom is the pretty, basketballing, cleaning mom. I will grant her the pretty mom part, but the basketball, cleaning mom is a reach. In fact, every time we step into a gym, I have to hear her complain about the bouncing balls. They give her a headache! Imagine, bouncing balls in a gym!
     As for the cleaning part... I really think that Noah meant to include Irma in that part of the letter. Irma is the cleaning lady that had been coming to our house to help clean every other week. Like any other six-year-old, Noah just did not feel like doing the extra work and writing, "Dear Mom, Dad, and Irma..."
     After reading Noah's letter, I pictured Cheryl as June Cleaver, with her hair made up, all decked out in a dress (Does anyone remember their mother ever wearing a dress unless she was going out for the evening?), bouncing a basketball in her left hand as she vacuums the living room carpet with her right.
     I am not so sure that even if Cheryl had the desire to do these two things simultaneously, that she would have the ability to do these two things simultaneously! I have seen her play basketball, and she has no left hand. When we play one on one, I sit on her right hand and force her to go left and she's got nothing! But does Noah mention that I kick Mom's butt in basketball? Of course not!
     The fact is that when I get home, I am lucky if Cheryl has managed to get out of her sweats that day. I refer to sweats and a tee-shirt as Mom's uniform. I would suggest that she contact the CINTAS uniform cleaning people, but I'm afraid that if I do that, she would never get around to doing the rest of the family's laundry. As for her hair, nine times out of ten, she has it twisted up in a pencil. That's right, I said a pencil!
     I understand that little boys love their mothers, but give me a break. How can he ignore all the things that I do around here.  For example, I make the kids clean their rooms and if they don't do it, their mother does it for them. I make the kids empty the dishwasher, and if they don't do it, their mother does it for them. I make the kids do their homework, and if they can't do it, their mother does it for them (at least she helps). I make the kids fold their laundry and if they don't do it, their mother does it for them.  I reprimand the kids when they don't do well in school, when they can't give me plausible explanation, their mother gives it for them.
     Oh... I get it now. Mom's the good cop, and I'm the bad, albeit profitable, cop! Well, just so everybody knows, there is no way Mom could do all that she does if I wasn't out making all the money for the family.
    Alright, alright, I concede... Noah had it right all along. At least in his mind, she does it all while I am out making the money. Hmmmm, this does make me wonder what his Valentine's Day letter may look like ten years from now:
     Dear Mom and Dad... There are many reasons why I love you. Mom you are still the prettiest Mom in the world. Thank you for being my teacher, my counselor and my friend. You have done so much for me and given so much to me that words cannot describe how much I love you. Dad, thanks for paying for everything! Love, Noah
     ps... Mom... Dad asked me to clean my room, unload the dishwasher and fold the laundry. I never got around to doing that stuff, but when he leaves for work, could you hook me up and take care of that stuff? You're the best!  
     pps... Dad... I need forty bucks so I can buy a gift for Mom. Would you please leave that on the table before you leave for Court? On second thought, make it eighty. I also have to get something for Irma!