Funny Guy Friday… Good things come in threes...

     Funny Guy Friday is written each week by my husband Mark.  So… I married a funny guy...
     There are weeks that I struggle to come up with things to write about for Funny Guy Friday. It is then that I thank God that we have Noah: a funny, mixed up, cute little seven-year-old that I can always count on for a little material.
     After Cheryl and I had two kids and two miscarriages, we had a discussion about staying pat with two. About a month after our decision, I came home from work a bit dejected.  Cheryl greeted me at the door and asked if everything were okay. I had just made partner at work, and I had told Cheryl that I was no longer on salary and that I was going to get paid once a month, and if it were a bad month, I wouldn't get paid at all. On this particular payday, I had made $1,500 for the entire month. OUCH!
    Cheryl told me she had a surprise and she handed me a small, wrapped, flat, rectangular package. I grabbed it and told her, You did not have to wrap a new credit card for me, although it will come in handy this month; I already have plenty of credit cards. She told me it was not a credit card and asked me to unwrap it.
     As I unwrapped it, I saw that it was a pregnancy test. I looked at it and I asked, Whose is this? Is this my niece's? Why would you give me my niece's pregnancy test? This is kind of gross!  She assured me it was not my niece's test but it still did not register.
     You see, with her other pregnancies, we were trying to get pregnant, and we were in it together. I mean, I was right there when she would take the tests, and I did everything except urinate on the strip myself. This was different, this test was done without me.
     Cheryl told me it was indeed her test, but I was still not sure of what was going on.  I asked Cheryl if it were positive or negative… the whole time wondering why she would wrap up a negative pregnancy test. She must think that I really did not want to have another kid.
     After it finally registered that we were going to have a third child, Cheryl asked me two questions. First, Are you happy? Are you kidding? I would have had thirty kids if it were possible. Don't tell Cheryl this but the only reason I was content to stop at two in the first place was because Cheryl had had really tough deliveries and she was getting older. Not older in the regular sense of the word, but older in the childbearing sense. Then something registered with Cheryl and she asked, Do we have enough money for another child?  We didn't have enough money for the first two, so why worry about that now? By the way, that may have been the first and last time that she has ever asked about money. What a great wife!
     So now we have Noah and we could not imagine our lives without the little man, and I could not imagine what I would do on a slow FGF week without him.
     This week Noah approached Cheryl and me and told us he had a great idea for a gift for his sister when she turns sixteen. We asked what he had in mind and he told us he wanted to buy her an itunes gift card. Great idea. We told him that a $25 gift card would be great. $25? That is not enough. I want to get her a $100 gift card. By the way, how much does a $100 gift card cost? he asked.
     Well, $100, of course.
     $100? That's stupid. Why would anyone pay that much for a gift card. Just give her a $100 bill. Great idea, do you have $100 bill?
     Yes, yes, I do, he advised. This left me with two thoughts: where did he get a $100 bill, and now I will stop borrowing from Matthew every time I have no money for the pizza guy.  
     Then on Wednesday, we got a big rain in the morning. The boys' baseball games were called off fairly early in the day. The problem was that the rain stopped and the sun came out and the field that Noah was scheduled to play on was dry enough to play. A late email went out and I got a call from Cheryl on my drive home advising that it was game on. She told me Noah was out playing and was not going to be happy about this turn of events.
      Noah does not love baseball. He likes it okay once he gets out there, but the real reason that I think that Noah plays baseball is because his dad played, his uncles played, his cousins played and his brother is still playing. He also plays because he likes to get new cleats. As of right now, there is no great passion, but we are working on it.
      I told Cheryl to rally the troops and get Noah ready because he was going to go to the game. About twenty minutes later, I walked through the door to find Noah in his game shirt and a pair of shorts. I was a bit surprised that he was not ready to walk out the door in full uniform. I told him to get up and get his stuff because we were leaving in two minutes. I was not happy and it was obvious to everyone because Grace actually got off of her facebook and went to help him find his stuff.
      Once in the car, I tried to explain to Cheryl what the phrase "rally the troops" means. This did not appear to amuse her and she explained that it was all that she could do to get him to get his shirt on. As loudly and as clearly as I could, I explained to Noah that when Mom tells him to do something, he is to do it whether he likes it or not. I may have even quoted a father of one of my old girlfriends and told Noah that if Mom tells you that a flea can pull a plow, you should hook it up and not ask questions. 
      He explained that he does not think he is that good in baseball and he did not want to go to the game. Then he asked what a flea had to do with anything? I abandoned the flea thing and sternly explained what it means to be part of a team.
     Always kinder and gentler, Cheryl jumped in and told him that when you do the right thing, God will provide blessings. Whatever, Miss Goody Two Shoes. That is all well and good, but God also knows what it is like to be on a team!
     We got to the game a little late and Noah almost immediately came up to bat.
     I interrupt this regularly scheduled FGF for this important baseball note:
     Not to get too Inside Baseball on everybody, but for the most part, Noah has good mechanics with his swing. He has a balanced stance, he loads his hands, he shifts his weight, and he finishes his swing. There are times that he looks great up at the plate. The one little problem is that he misses the ball… a lot. Although it has frustrated me a bit, I realize that in the long run, his good mechanics will help him become a better hitter. There are kids that hit the ball and, as a dad, I wonder, How is that kid hitting the ball and Noah is not? As a coach, I think, That kid is going to have to completely change the way he swings when he gets older. Maybe the fact that earlier in the year, Noah fouled a pitch off of his bat right into his face doesn't really help much… but he seems to be over that little incident.
     Back to our regularly scheduled FGF:
     We got to the game late and Noah almost immediately came up to bat. On his second pitch, he laced a single to left for his first hit of the season. Second time up, same result for his second hit of the season. Third time up, he dinked it down the first base line and beat out the tag. Three for three. Sweet night at the plate.
     On the drive home, I told Noah that as usual, I was right. Noah asked me what I was talking about. I told him that I have always said that if you do the right thing, God will bless you with three hits!
     Both Noah and Cheryl were quick to point out that it was Cheryl who suggested the whole God/Blessing thing while I rambled on about a team full of fleas. Whatever. They never really listen!
     Now that I think about it, I am onto something with blessings coming in threes. For Noah, he did the right thing and he came out of it with three great hits. For Cheryl and me, we did the right thing and we came out of it with three great kids.
     So, as usual, in a round about way…...I was right!
     Funny how that always happens on Fridays!