Funny Guy Friday... Thanksgiving with the family...

    It is Thanksgiving night and I am lying in bed contemplating the wonderful times we have had over the past few days and the times that lie ahead of us this coming weekend. 
    My sister, Michel and her family are in from Texas and Cheryl's sisters Sue and Ann are in from Washington and New Jersey. In my humble opinion, Thanksgiving is the best holiday of the year. There are no gifts to buy, very little decorating, NFL games on TV, and four days to catch up with family. Sure, you have to cook but you have to eat no matter what day it is, so why not go big one day of the year. 
    I love my family. I love Cheryl's family. I love spending time with all of them. Family is what it is all about. What could possibly make the weekend better? 
     I know... I have a great idea... they could all go home! 
     That's right. Go home. Every last one of you. I haven't slept and I am exhausted. 
     My brother in law and my two nieces just arrived in town yesterday and I only got to visit with them for a short time. I have one request of them... get back on the plane and go back to Houston. I love you, but I will catch up with you some other time. I'm tired.  
     Let me explain. Our house is like a flop house. I have no idea who is coming or who is going. There have been different people at our house for four straight days and if people aren't spending the night, they are here anyway. 
     Sue was the first to arrive on Saturday. We met her at Cheryl's mom's house that evening. A very nice visit that eased us into the holiday week. When we got home... near midnight... Cheryl advised that her entire family was coming over to our house the next day for a chili dinner.  But we just saw them. She will be here all week. We have a lot to do!  
    Cheryl's response was typical:  Nah, we'll be fine. I always pull the house together. 
    This is true, but I reminded my dear wife that she had to pick up my sister Michel at the airport on Monday, she had to take my mother to the doctor, and she had to homeschool (oh yes, you read that right, class is in through Wednesday. I run a tight academic ship). Oh, and by the way, we are hosting my family.....fifty of my family... on Thursday for Thanksgiving dinner, so we have to get the house ready. Time is of the essence.
     I know, she assured me, I got it!  We will be fine.
     Sunday arrived and so did Cheryl's two sisters, their kids, her brother and her mom and dad. I had spent the day with Cheryl and our kids getting our basement squared away before they all arrived. We had a lovely visit and some delicious chili. They spent the evening with us and left at about 9 p.m.  I was pretty tired and was relaxing while watching the Ravens game. Cheryl noticed I was relaxing when she thought it was appropriate to "remind" me that I still needed to paint the inside of our new closet because the workers were coming to put the doors on Monday morning.
     You never told me that. I am ready for bed.
     I did tell you that.
     No way, I would remember that. If we have so much to do, perhaps the family could have come another time. Grace... did mom tell me I had to paint the closet before Monday?
     Yes, she did.
     Gracie, you are a big fat liar!
     I am not exactly sure why Grace would conspire against me like this, but she did. She must have done something wrong and her mother was holding it over her head. I have had this theory for a long time now, but I have no hard proof... just a lot of anecdotal evidence such as this.
     Now you may have noticed that I asked Grace and not Noah or Matthew. You see, they were gone. They left for a sleepover at Grammy's with their cousins. It appears that the rats were running off of my tight academic ship. I was informed that school was officially closed for Thanksgiving break.
     Anyway, I am not one to stand in the way of a household project, so I got my brush and my roller and grabbed a gallon of paint from the basement and headed into the new closet. Two hours later, after, admittedly, the worst paint job in the world, I called it a day. What the heck, it is a closet for goodness sake and I have to go to work in the morning. 
    You are going to do a second coat, aren't you? And you are going to paint the ceiling, aren't you?  The job foreman was a real taskmaster. 
    It's a closet. No, I am not. Don't ask me again, I am not doing it.
    I finished the second coat and the ceiling at 2 a.m.  
    While at work on Monday, Cheryl called me on her way to the airport to inform me that the work
crew had not yet arrived and she asked that I investigate. When I spoke to our handyman, I was advised 
that the store ordered the wrong size doors. I think they will be coming some time next week to finish the job, but I am not sure because I dozed off in the middle of the conversation. It may have had  something to do with the late night painting that I did so they could HANG THE DOORS!
     On the way home from work, Cheryl called to tell me that both my sister Michel and her sister Sue 
were both staying for pizza. This was unprecedented... we were combining families for visits... while the clock keeps ticking. Great, but we still need to get the house ready for Thursday.  
     No problem. We will be fine. 
     Cheryl says that a lot to me.
     She had a plan to send each of our kids out for sleepovers with various cousins and we would be home alone. I liked this idea. This was an encouraging turn of events. I have not been home alone with my beautiful wife with no kids in more than sixteen years. This was a VERY encouraging turn of events. Think about this, we had no kids to interrupt us while we... ahem... cleaned the house and rearranged the furniture. 
     I wish I could throw some quotation marks around cleaned the house and rearranged the furniture, but we actually did clean the house and rearrange the furniture. That's right boys and girls, we were up until 2 a.m. cleaning and rearranging, with no quotation marks. It was great... exhausting, but great. 
     I got up for work on Wednesday, bleary eyed. I did take a half day so I could get home and help with the final preparations before the crowd descended on our home. These preparations were interrupted by both of Cheryl's sisters who dropped by at various times with various kids. Some, I think were mine, but I was not sure who belonged where at this point. We were invited to go out to dinner and despite my concerns, we took the kids out to Red Robin at the mall. 
    Relax, we will be fine. It will all get done. Guess who! 
    We had another great time, but I am not going to lie, it was a set back. Another late night. I got to bed after 1:30 a.m. and had to get up early to buy the donuts for the annual family Turkey Bowl football game. 
    My team lost, and we lost, in large part, to my exhaustion. You cannot hoot with the owls at 
night and soar with the eagles in the morning.  
    Now it is 1 a.m, and I am typing this Funny Guy Friday after hosting the Thanksgiving feast. Guess what... we were fine. We got it all done. And dinner was a success. 
    Cheryl has got to learn to relax.
    I am so thankful for so many things, but our families are at the top of the list. In reality, I would not change a single thing about this week except maybe spending even more time with everybody. Don't believe me? Cheryl's family, all twenty five of them, are coming over for leftovers tomorrow, er, uh, today.
    I hope you all had a chance to spend some time with your loved ones and had a happy and blessed Thanksgiving.
    But for now... I gotta get some sleep. I'm exhausted. Good night.