November

Matthew 13.
Hindsight is 2020.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Funny Guy Friday... Musings from my funny hubby... Drive of shame

    On Sunday, while getting ready to go to my son's baseball game, I unpacked the back of Cheryl's car to make room, so I could take her and our son to his baseball game. I had to make room for the chairs, the baseball gear, etc.
     As usual, we were running late because we could not find a sock or a glove... or something that you have to have to play a baseball game... and that should be put in the same place every time... so I was just unloading stuff into the garage as quickly as I could.
     My wife and I were able to enjoy a great game, while my daughter watched our youngest. We rushed home to spend time with them, and had a great night. All in all, it was a great day.
     On Monday, I walked out to my car, running a bit late because I couldn't find a tie, or a sock... or something that I need to have to go to work... and should be put in the same place every time... so I rushed to get in the car and go.
     As I drove up our street, there was a gentleman walking his dog. My daughter often comments how often owners look like their pets. For some unknown reason, I decided that, today, I would test her theory out.
     As I sized up man and beast, the gentleman gave me a friendly nod and a point. Since I was concentrating on determining if he looked like his dog, I did not immediately acknowlege the manly point, but when I did, I responded with an equally manly return point. I had no idea who he was but he seemed to know me, and seemed to be a nice neighbor from our nice neighborhood.
     This was not quite as awkward as meeting someone you should know, but cannot remember his name or how you know him. I have been in these situations many times. I always tell Cheryl that if I do not immediately introduce someone to her, she is to give her name and ask them their name. It is at this point I say, I'm sorry _______, I did not introduce you, this is my wife Cheryl. After 18 years of marriage, she has become particularly adept at this particular move.
     Although I did not recognize this dog walker, he seemed awfully friendly as he gave me a second point. Not to be outdone, I gave a return point, and raised him a wave goodbye. I love my neighborhood, everyone is so nice.
     Anyway, as we exchanged greetings, I heard something that sounded like rumbling in my trunk. I assumed it was a loose baseball rolling around. Although annoying, it was not worthy of my stopping to correct the problem.
     As I completed my turn, I heard the same sound only louder and this time followed by a loud thud. Surprisingly, this was still not worthy of a stop, but it did warrant a glance in the rearview mirror. I actually wondered if my new friend had heard the thud, and if he and his dog were safe.
     When I looked, I noticed that lying in the road were a car seat, a sweater and a sweatshirt that looked very much like the carseat, the sweater and the sweatshirt that I had removed from my wife's car the previous day, and placed on top of my car, so I would not forget to put them back in my wife's car the very next day.
     My new friend was no friend at all. He was just some guy pointing to the car seat on top of my car.  He did not expect a point and a wave back at all... he was just saying, Hey idiot! You left your kid's car seat on the top of your car!
     Talk about a DRIVE OF SHAME... when you have to go back to the scene of the crime, and pack up your goods, and drive off. There is no cool way to do this, nor is there any way to make it look like you meant to crash a car seat from the top of your car on purpose. Particularly embarrassing when some jerky neighbor and his flea ridden dog are both standing there laughing at you.
     The only positive at this point is that, when I issued the return point, I did not pull the thumb hammer down and make the click click sound that you make when you do pull the thumb hammer down.
     Now I hate my neighborhood. With all the dignity I had left, I packed up my belongings and drove off. However, I smiled as I drove off because I got the last laugh... when they were both laughing at me, I realized that my freak of a neighbor and his stupid dog look exactly alike.

1 comment:

  1. That's a pretty good one Mark. It's happens to the best of us. Good thing no one was IN the car seat!

    ReplyDelete

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